One Year Later

Over the last couple of weeks, we've had several anniversaries around here. All are important. And they all signify life-changing events. This last year has been awful and amazing. The illness - awful. God's provision - amazing.

On April 27, 2006, our precious daughter Danielle was in an awful accident that could well have taken her from us. The shock of that accident served as a catalyst to get me to evaluate just how precious and tenuous this life can be. As a result of my prayer time about that, I was led to call for a mammogram. And so on April 27 this year, we celebrated the fact that God intervened in two ways one year ago: 1) he saved my baby girl when that truck plowed into her little car dubbed "the silver bullet" and 2) he saved me by nudging me to make the call that began this most awful year.

On May 18, 2006, after undergoing a mammogram, two ultrasounds, two exams, and a core needle biopsy (ouch!!!!), I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer. So this year, on May 18, I prepared myself to get up and think about my most awful year all day. But God had other plans. Instead, I received a call to go to be with a church member at the hospital. She was in alot of pain, and I spent my morning sitting with her and doing what I could to comfort her. And then I spent the afternoon sittting with her husband while his beloved underwent a procedure to determine what was causing the pain. So I spent that entire day doing what God has taught me to do during this last year....being a Pastor and a friend-- having compassion for the pain, fear, and questioning of others.

And one year ago today, I had the lumpectomy that removed the cancer from my body, hopefully forever. I remember how amazed I was on that day that people came to be with me and my family. Several friends came and prayed over me before my surgery. Some who prayed over me were just mere acquantances, and I cried when I saw their compssion and faith. I had seen this many, many times and even participated in it as part of my work, but I had never been the person on the stretcher with a life-threatening disease crushing down upon me. This was the beginning of my "tenderizing" by God.

From that day on, God bombarded me with people's tenderness and thoughtfulness. I received cards, food, calls, and the most thoughtful gifts from people I didn't even know. I had at least 2 women pray over me that I had never seen in my life but met by circumstance. Both women told me God would heal me. One told me God was not too happy with the way I was doing my ministry, and she basically told me he wanted me to get out of the way (my ego) and let him do it. Whew.....

There are other anniversaries coming up....gettting my port, the first chemo, the last chemo. Getting my port OUT! The first radiation, the final radiation. The beginning of Femara and Fosomax. The hysterectomy.

But perhaps the best anniversary I've had recently was on April 29. On that day, Rick and I celebrated 7 years of marriage. And I do mean we celebrated. Because we are happy. Happy to be married. Happy to be married to one another. Blessed beyond belief. Equally yoked. Frighteningly similar. Laughingly different. In love. In like.

I am blessed beyond belief to be here today to write to you. And I'm so glad that God has tenderized me this past year. It hasn't always felt good, but it sure was what I needed.

God bless you.

I know, I'm awful!

It has been so very long since I have posted. On the one hand, that's a really great thing because it means I'm living again. On the other, it means I'm a horrible friend to all of you who have been so faithful to check in with me and my blog. My hysterectomy went extremely well. Okay - as well as things can go when they take out parts that have been with you for 48 years. But I was back to exercising right away and doing way more than I was told I could do.....it's a game I play you know----being the most obnoxious patient I can be in hopes that the docs will tell me not to come back! Well, anyway, they told me that everthing was normal and I go see my doc tomorrow for my 4 week checkup and release. Very early Tuesday morning Rick and I leave for Hunting Island where we will lie on the beach, ride our bikes, etc.

I attended a Relay for Life on Friday night and it was so powerful. I stood on the stage, introduced myself, and said "I am survivor", I suppose for the first time in public. It was great fun. But, I was saddened by the fact that there were 1,000 names represented at the Relay -- folks who were being honored or remembered. That's just too stinkin' many.

My friends in the neighborhood are having a fundraiser while we're gone to help fund my 3-day walk this year (don't worry - Danielle will still need your donations!!!!!) and it's a tennis tournament called Tennis for TaTas. Isn't that great? Go ladies. I am so thankful for you and your hard work!

I continue to give thanks for each of you who continue to pray for us and call and send cards. I can never express what it means to us.

More Fun in My Future

Greetings everyone! Last week I met with a new oncologist who will replace the doc that treated me through chemo. When I went through my first round of followup testing, I found out from the nurse that my liver scan showed an abnormality and was told that the doc had to discuss it with me. As I waited for her call, I got more and more nervous. When her call never came, I made a series of calls to her. After waiting 2 weeks without a call, I decided that I needed a different doctor. Perhaps one who would actually return phone calls!

So, now I see Doctor Galleshaw. She sent me to a couple of NEW doctors for future fun procedures. I'll be having another surgery in April. No new cancer ... we're just clearing out "spare parts" so that we don't have to worry about new cancer. I'm thinking recovery on my back deck in April doesn't sound too bad.....

But for now, I'm having a blast. Lots of exercise, lots of work, and lots of fun. We were at the beach this past weekend and go again in 3 weeks. And my hair is growing like crazy. God is good!

More later. Love to you all.

Radiation Is Done - Sorry I've been Gone!

Okay - let me begin by apologizing for my absence these last two months! Radiation is completely finished, but it was very time-consuming and energy draining! I went every day (except I got weekends off for good behavior) and it was so tiring, that most days I came home from work and just crashed. Still no excuse for not sharing.

I am completely done with treatment, have been on my hormone therapy for one month now, and am beginning to feel normal again! I am back to most of my "normal" routine including full work schedule, working out, running 90 miles per hour, and giving Rick and everyone else a run for their money. Of course, normal will never be normal again. And I'm thankful for that. God has revealed so much to me during this time, and he has prepared me for a new direction in my ministry and my life.

Life is good - God is amazing. And I am so, so thankful for all of you. For your care, your patience, and your love. And I'm really thankful that I have some hair of my own now (that insurance didn't buy for me!)

Here's a picture taken last night at beautiful Danielle's induction into the National Honor Society. She is an amazing gift. As we move into the time of Lent, I pray that you will find time every day to be quiet and to LISTEN to what God is trying to say to you. Don't be like me and wait until he has to SHOUT! :)

Radiation Begins

Now that chemo is done, I get to begin a new adventure in cancer treatment. Radiation. 6 weeks - 25-30 treatments.

So.....on Tuesday, November 28, just one day after having my port removed, I dutifully reported to the Radiation Center. The technicians took me back and showed me the daily routine. I come into the waiting area. My name will be called over the intercom. "Mrs. Watson, you may now report to the changing area". So I then go back and take off my clothes and put on this really, really cute little paper dress and wait in another waiting area with my clothes in tow. Then a technician comes out to get me and we go the room with the big skull and crossbones on the door that says "Massive Radiation Inside" (I'm only exaggerating a little bit here). Then they put me on this very narrow table that's connected to the big monster machine and they tie my feet together (I guess so if I try to run I can't get far). Then all of these really cool lasers come on and they line them up with parts of my body to be "radiated". But on this first day, I got to have some special fun. In order to know where to line the lasers up, my friendly technicians had to place tatoos on my sides and middle of my chest. Far better than the temporary marks they made with Sharpee pens, but still not as fun as a real tatoo. I tried to get them to give me a rising phoenix or a butterfly or something to show my grandchildren some day, but they weren't really amused. Guess they wanted to get to lunch or something.

So the next day, Wednesday, I have my first radiation. I go through all the steps and the radiation itself takes maybe 3 minutes tops. I'm not really sure how long it goes because I pray while it's going. But I know I don't get too far down my prayer list before they come back in and unhook my feet so I can run......... :)

Ding Dong the Port is Gone!

My dear friends,

Please forgive me for being so remiss on not updating the site. Life is happening - and that's a good thing - but wonderful exercises like updating this site are behind. So let me try to catch up a bit...

I went to see my oncologist the Tuesday before Thanksgiving. It was SOOOOO strange to go to the cancer center and not go back to the chemo area. Strange in a very good way, of course. As I sat in the waiting room, I realized that I was now in a different group. I was no longer carrying my bag with crackers, lotion, gum, candy, blankets, stuffed animals--all of the essentials needed to get through 4 hours of chemotherapy. I was no longer sitting with the row of folks waiting to be called back to the chemo room -- all of us looking as if we were soon to be made into sausage or something equally grotesque. No, I was now with the folks who got to see the doctor and pray that she had a smile on her face, meaning she had good news to share.

When Doctor Austin came into the room, I'll admit that I was nervous. I was afraid she'd come in and announce that there'd been a mistake - that she was sending me back to hang out with the chemoclan. But alas, she did not. She told me that there are patients that she's worried about, but that I was not one of them! She said I'm kicking you out and don't want to see you until mid January. And then she said the magic words I had really longed to hear "you can go get your port out now--we won't be needing it anymore!" Praise God and Amen!

So, the port removal was scheduled for Monday morning following Thanksgiving. And what a Thanksgiving we had! My Brother Ronnie came from North Carolina and my cousin Chris joined us from Florida. We had 7 children, 9 adults (and two small dogs) share a beautiful meal with thankful hearts that we were once again together, that we were all relatively healthy, and that we are blessed to live in the knowledge that Christ is King and we are His beloved.

Then Rick and I pulled off an amazing coup.....we were able to go away for two days that weekend, just the two of us, for a romantic weekend in the mountains! It was warm and beautiful and we had a great time.

And then Monday morning, 8:00 a.m., Dr. Luke rolled me into surgery and removed my port, that little button-shaped device used to infuse me with the chemo drugs. The port had been implanted in my chest for 5 LONG months, and according to Dr. Luke it had made itself quite at home there. He had to "persuade" it to let go of the scar tissue that was hugging it. By 10:00 a.m., I was home resting and thankful to be free of "buttons" in my chest.

But not to worry, tomorrow will bring another new adventure in the road to cancer recovery.....

A True Mountaintop Experience

November 8 finally arrived. The day I had looked forward to and worked for throughout Chemo. The day Rick and I would make our annual trek up Mt. LeConte in Tennessee. We've done this every year since we've been married, and we plan it a year in advance. So when I was diagnosed, Rick said "well, I guess we'll be cancelling our plans for LeConte this year." And I said, "not so fast". "I'm not willing to cancel anything until I absolutely know I can't do it".

Before cancer, I exercised every other day. Weights and eliptical. I was in the shape of my life. One of my fears about my illness was that I would lose what I had worked so hard for - the muscle tone and energy that allowed me to hike and enjoy other activities that I love. So every day during chemo I had a goal. Walk. Exercise. Stay in shape so I could still make it to the top of LeConte. When I got my chemo schedule, I realized that I would only have one week to recover before LeConte.

November 8, we left for Leconte. We stayed in Cherokee that evening, and woke up early to make it to trailhead. We started hiking at about 10:00 a.m. I did really well until we got to the steep part - where the ascent was pretty well straight up. Then I started to feel the pain in my upper legs - the burn that comes when your muscles aren't strong enough to carry your body. So Rick starts singing to me. What a wonderful gesture! He knew it would make me laugh, which would take my mind off of my pain. I think he sang the last hour up. And most people would stop when other people came along - not my Rick. He just kept on singing. I love this man!

Here are our pictures. They say more than I can about why we make this trip every year. We sit up on the rocks and read our bibles and talk and laugh and share the silence and beauty only God could have created.

The Final Chemo

November 1, 2006, I sat through what I pray will be my final chemo ever! It was a beautiful day, and chemo was a breeze. My mom (well, she's actually Rick's mom--but I have adopted her as my own) took me to the treatment just as she took me to my first. She in her sassy stetson style hat, me in my Pink Harley doo-rag. What a pair!

After chemo, we went to lunch before heading home. The chemo pretty well kicked me -- right into bed for 3 or 4 days. I was very fatigued and uncharacteristically quiet. After that, I began to get my normal allergic reaction to the chemo - rashes in places we won't discuss here. Suffice it to say I was uncomfortable. The rash eventually took away my ability to taste food - which was not fun since I love to eat. Today, more than two weeks later, the reaction has moved to the inside of my eyelids and my eyes water alot and I look like I'm about 70. But it's getting better every day. God is good and far better people than me have experienced worse.

Thanks for your continued prayers and for laughing along with me through this fun.

Hospitals and Blessings

Catching up on posting.....so this happened the week of October 23......

After having a phenemonal time at the 3-day, I unexpectedly ended up in the hospital for a day. I had been feeling really tired, which is unusual for me even throughout chemo. I'm talking REALLY tired - like I didn't care if I ate or anything. Then I had a strange twinge in my chest and then it became tightness. So I stopped by the see my good friends Dr. Gordon and Carolyn Peltier (his nurse, my sweet friend) just to get my vitals checked because Rick was worried I was going to have a heart attack and leave him with 3 girls and all the housework. So I figured I'd just be there a few minutes to get my blood pressure checked and be on my way! But my good friends sent me to the emergency room for further evaluation. And I guess because Gordon is a LEGEND at Northside the ER doc took my case very personally and very seriously and I ended up with THREE (3) wonderful doctors taking care of me and lots and lots of tests later I got to come home. But not before I had some laughs. My cardiologist had seen me in the ER and then again the following morning - both times I had my beautiful wig on my head. Then later in the day, he came to visit me to share test results, only this time, my hair was on the side table rather than on my head. Bless his heart - he came in and started apologizing that he had visited the wrong room - I finally convinced him it was me when I pointed to the side table and said "see - there's my hair, it's me I promise"! When one has no hair, no eyelashes, and a port that looks like one of those buttons that pops up when the turkey is done, one must find things to laugh about!

Final diagnosis after 24 hours in the hospital: maybe stress, maybe chemo. No heart problems though. I am in great shape. I am thankful my friends sent me though. It made me feel good to know that all of this chemo had not destroyed anything other than cancer!

The Sunday after I was in the hospital, I was blessed to be able to share my testimony at church. What a powerful day for me. God has taught me so much through this journey that 10 minutes hardly seemed enough time to share all the ways I am blessed. I am blessed that we caught the cancer early. I am blessed that I have phenomenal doctors. I am blessed to have the best husband and children in the world. And the best friends and neighbors. And the best dogs -- Hannah and Harley, who have faithfully sat at my feet or beside my bed for the past 65 months. And the best church and job - a job where I get to love and be loved every day, serving my Father in Heaven who teaches me every minute of my life what love truly is.

Atlanta 3-Day

October 20-22, 2006, 2,250 women, including my Asphalt Angels, walked 60 miles over 3 days to raise money and awareness for breast cancer. My daughter, Danielle, her best friend Blakely, my cousin Julie, my good friend Jane, and my new friends, Tracy M, Tracy C , and Pat, made up the Asphalt Angels team.

The team arrived at the 3-day opening ceremonies in style on Friday morning. Another team, the Boobsavers, had managed to get limos donated for the ride, and invited our team (even me!) to join them. It was amazing to arrive there to all of the fanfare, with the 3-day crew already cheering on the walkers!

The opening ceremony was wonderful, and as the walkers began their long trek, we cheered them out of the gate with our posters that had been designed by Danielle and made by Jane and Randy. As soon as they left, I got to the first cheering station, where my good friend Carolyn met me. We had a bit of a wait – the team passed a Starbucks and decided they needed a treat – then they had to make an unexpected pitstop in the woods!

That afternoon I went to the next cheering spot and had more fun. My friend Carole, who worked team and was back at camp waiting for my girls to arrive, had given me some great cheering tips and aids. I had a cowbell that made me very popular among the other cheerers – no need for screaming so much with that thing making so much noise!

By that evening, temperatures dropped to the 30s, and the girls called me to let me know that they had ice inside their tents! Saturday morning, I headed out early to cheer AND to take more clothing and provisions to camp. Good thing I had friends on the inside, or else I wouldn’t have been able to take more gear. Carole and Michelle met me and took the bags with extra blankets in –and I took them for a much needed burger break.

Saturday night it warmed up a bit, but began to rain :{ But alas, I received calls from the team that everyone was in good spirits and doing quite well.

Rick, Kat, Rebecca, and even Hannah and Harley, and I all went down to Piedmont Park early so that we could cheer on the walkers as they made their way to the finish line. Carolyn and Chad joined us, as did Bill Bean and Art. Carole and Amy were there too!
I can’t tell you how I felt when I saw my Danielle walking toward me, with that big grin on her face. She was the most beautiful thing I think I’ve ever seen! We walked across the finish line all together, and I was so thankful to be there in that moment.

The closing ceremonies were absolutely beautiful. We watched as over 2,000 women walked in, arm in arm, cheering one another on. But the amazing part is that they had all of the women who were survivors who had walked come in last. As these women came in, the rest of the walkers removed their shoes and held them up in honor of these women. It was so beautiful, and I cried for all of us. The survivors and everyone who loves them. For all women who may ever face this. For our daughters who we pray never will.

God is good. Thank you for supporting our team this year. You did good. It makes a difference.