Is This All There Is?

Last night, I had the absolute best time. I got to go to Hickory Flat and co-lead a class called Beginnings. Our discussion topic was "is this all there is?" We pondered upon the notion that each of us in this life has faced a disappointment or two - or longed for something and when we finally got it, we had to ask the question "is this all there is?". We were asking the question in the larger context of whether or not God actually exists - and if so, is it possible that our lives are meant for more than obtaining and enjoying "stuff", gathering trophies or titles, or just hanging out and hanging on.

This morning as I prayer walked around my neighborhood, I passed a young mother with her new baby. As I watched her, I was reminded of how powerful it had been for me when I became a mother. All I wanted and needed was to hold Danielle. To watch Danielle. To photograph Danielle. To marvel at the gift of Danielle and her sweet, sweet aroma.

Then I passed by a grandfather holding up his little granddaughter - grabbing her hand and getting her to wave hi to me. I remembered what it was like to watch my mom with Danielle. How sure she was that Danielle would be the next miracle child and be ready not just to wave - but to talk and sing and dance as an infant. And I'm sure mom was thinking - my little girl has had a little girl and now I'm finally a grandmother and all I have to do is enjoy and spoil her!

Then I walked past a woman who was having trouble walking. She was probably in her 70s, and looked as if she was suffering from arthritis. I thought - wow. Now that's something. She's out here, clearly feeling the gravity of every step. Yet she kept her eyes forward and concentrated and kept going. And as I passed her (imagine the insult of being passed by a turnip-headed chemo patient), she was grinning as if satisfied. She was being triumphant this morning!

Every morning I take these walks, and I think about the lives of my neighbors. And as I think of them, I think about my own life, and all the stages and blessings. There are aspects to our lives that simply transend "stuff" and position and title. There are aspects of our lives that can never be quantified on a spreadsheet or a balance sheet. The joy that begins deep in our soul, the yearning for more.

These blessings are simply God. Our ability to love our children so deeply and desparately is modeled after our own father's love for us. Not one of us would hesitate to put our own lives ahead of that of our child's. Neither did or would He. Our desire in old age to continue to be vital and have purpose can fade with illness, but generally most of us have a built-in yearning to keep going. God gave us that too. The gift of this life is in the process of continuing to grow as people and as God's children.

Is that all there is? No. But if it were all there was, it'd still be pretty good.